Merry Commercemas!

Well, it's that time of year again... or still, if you just read what I wrote yesterday. Everyone woke up early to see what presents Santa left under the tree for them, and opened up the boxes to reveal new DVDs, or XBoxes, or maybe even a nice new thick winter coat. All in the name of Jesus.

See, that's the part that confuses me here. The name of the holiday is Christmas. Christ-mas. Christ. My name's Chris, but until they return my calls the holiday isn't about me; it's about Jesus Christ. And obviously, when Jesus was born the one thing he wanted to be known for was people giving each other things they don't want, don't need, and probably won't ever use.

The Story Of Jesus (Abridged)

About 2000 years ago a kid was born to a woman who claimed to be a virgin. Three men were present, none of whom claimed to be the father. One brought frankincense, one brought myrrh, and one obviously didn't know what a medicinal bush looked like.

Jesus lived hand to mouth as a carpenter and did some things people found cool, like turning water in to wine and something about bread and fish. Eventually the Romans crucified him because they didn't like what he had to say, but he rose from the dead a few days later to say hello and goodbye before ascending to Heaven, still penniless. The end.

Seriously, when did Christ get taken out of Christmas? Instead we made up a fat drunkard who commits breaking and entering at a mathematically impossible rate in order to steal food in exchange for goods. He's an obese hermit who keeps Elves in a sweatshop all year long, must have the worst case of diabetes known to man, and once a year the demand for sugar drives him out of hiding to somehow slide down chimneys to distribute "cheer."

Let's face it, Jesus hasn't had anything to do with Christmas for a long, long time. Jesus was a poor carpenter with ideas about love and peace, and somehow that message has been utterly perverted in to trying to see who can spend more money to demonstrate their love. You buy people things in the name of someone who had nothing? Don't you see the hypocrisy? Jesus preached unconditional love, not "love for those who buy you stuff."

Christmas isn't about Christ, it's about commerce. It's a time for people to go out and buy as much as possible, and give it to other people. There are even stores that only exist during the Christmas season. Be honest, when's the last time you said the word Jesus on December 25th?

Happy Unspecified Seasonal Holiday!

"But Chris, Christmas is the time of year we're all supposed to be good to each other." Bullshit. Who ever told you that you were only allowed to be good to people one day each year? For someone who claims to celebrate Jesus, you sure don't have a very good grasp of what he had to say. The point Jesus was trying to make was that you should always be good to each other, not just once a year.

Treating people like shit for 364 days in a row and then choosing the birthday of someone who preached unconditional love for all at all times as the day to be nice to people is an abomination and an insult. Accept Christmas for what it has become: a day of increased commerce. Nothing more, nothing less. You choose to have a family dinner that day? Good for you. Odds are it's the only time of year you do it; more commerce.

Then there's Boxing Day, when everyone wakes up as early as possible in order to buy more things they don't really need (or else they'd have it already) because it happens to be less expensive. You know what that is? More commerce.

Either Christmas is about Jesus, or it's about buying stuff. The two are mutually exclusive. Jesus was poor and had nothing, and he didn't care one way or the other whether people bought things for each other. He only cared that people were good to each other, and that doesn't take any money at all.

I have no delusions about how I spend Christmas: I give and receive presents, and have good food in good company. I don't pervert Christ's name to make me feel better about doing it, I accept it for what it is. So Merry Commercemas everyone. Try not to trip over your good will.

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