Christmas Music Or Bust!

"Hark hear the bells, sweet silver bells, all seem to say, ding dong m'kay." ..sorry about that, I got caught up in the Christmas music. Of course, it's that time of year, isn't it? Everyone playing Christmas carols, singing to themselves like crazy people... and no other music anywhere in sight. It has to stop.

Trans Siberian Orchestra

Now, I'm not saying Christmas music is bad, or that I don't like it. On the contrary, I quite enjoy most Christmas music. The problem is that as soon as December begins, it's all you hear. Anywhere. There are a handful of exceptions, but for the most part all you get to hear anywhere is the same couple dozen songs, in various versions, repeated over and over again.

Enough already. If I wanted to hear the same 20 songs for a month straight, I'd load them up on my mp3 player and walk around plugged in all day. Seriously, how many times can you hear Carol of the Bells in one month without it getting old? Do you really need to hear The 12 Days Of Christmas 5 times a day for the Christmas season to be worthwhile? And do you really need to force me to listen to it with you, as if I haven't already heard it five hundred times this month?

If you insist on carolling, have fun with it

I don't think I'd have a problem with Christmas music if it weren't for the fact it's literally everywhere for an entire month. Going to the mall? Each store you enter will be playing carols. Waiting in an elevator? Enjoy the muzak version of Santa Claus Is Coming To Town. Stuck in your car? Don't worry, odds are your favourite music station is playing carols as you read this. Going to a friend's house to visit? Guess what music they're playing.

We celebrate a lot of holidays in today's modern age. Odds are we've even invented a few just so we wouldn't have to go a whole month without celebrating something, but I don't feel like doing my due diligence to find out which ones. Name one other holiday for which you only play that holiday's music for a month straight. Go on, I dare you. Just one.

Tell you what: next year I'm going to play nothing but scary sounds for all of October, leading up to Hallowe'en. All March I'm only going to play Rick Astley's song Never Gonna Give You Up (I promise none of the videos on this page are Rick Rolls). Then you can tell me how it feels to have a month of the same music forcibly shoved down your throat when you hang out with me.

The best Christmas song ever written

Here's the real thing about Christmas music that upsets me: there's no shortage of other songs to play! There must be hundreds of Christmas songs, and Christmas-themed songs, that the radio stations, malls, and people could choose to play. Instead we only ever get the same handful, for who knows what reason. I'll bet you can't name more than 20 without looking it up, because you simply never hear the rest.

The song to the right is my favourite Christmas song of all time, and there's only one radio station I know of that plays it. It also happens to be the only Christmas song they ever play, and that infrequently, and that is why I listen to them online during Christmas. You like Christmas music? Good for you. You want to listen to Christmas music? Fantastic. Just change it up a little so nobody loses their mind and kills you.

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